I’m going to let you in on a little secret.
I’m not really all that good with words.
I know what you’re thinking. I can practically hear my close relatives and friends angrily telling me to take that back and shaking their fingers at me in admonition. “Noelle, you’re a poet! You’re a writer! Of COURSE you’re good with words!”
But that’s not what I mean.
What I mean is . . . I wasn’t born with a silver tongue. When I speak, I trip. I pause. I second-guess. Put me in front of actual people to talk to, and I guarantee I will say something so off the wall it will leave the person I’m talking to befuddled as to where that even came from. (Spoiler alert, it was from internal panic.) I will absolutely without fail shove my entirely too-big-feet into my mouth in any given situation. If there’s a chance for someone to say the wrong thing, I’m your gal, and I already said it.
But when I write, I return home.
Writing lets me breathe. It gives me the space I need in order to find my truth when my voice shakes or I pause for too long. I used to think that meant that I was broken or somehow wrong. I let it dictate how I behaved in social situations for years. I used to preface meeting new people with disclaimers of being too intense or awkward, just so that I could more easily prepare myself for the inevitable rejection as soon as I sat down next to them.
But I’ve since learned that there is nothing wrong with me. I just was not built to be a great speaker. I was never meant to speak to be heard.
I was meant to write to be seen.
And still, not everyone will read. Not everyone will sit in the stillness long enough to feel me slide in quietly next to them. And that’s okay. I’ve learned that those that will read my words, those that will stay long enough until the awkward panic finally leaves my nervous system, are the ones that actually see me for who I truly am.
Does that mean that this isn’t something I actively work on to fix? On the contrary, I work on it every day, and over the last three years I’ve worked incredibly hard at learning how to become Me better by relearning the essence of my spirit. It’s been a harrowing and arduous time. There are several things about me that have changed throughout my life—from how I prefer my eggs to how I interact with certain people—but there are a few solid foundations that have always remained true:
- I will always see the greatest potential in those around me, whether they choose to embody it or not.
- I have a big heart that loves fiercely, blindly, and unconditionally, which is oftentimes mistaken for being ingenuine by those unable to understand me.
- My intentions, whether misguided or not, are always for good, to help, or from a place of love.
I will always have a harder time expressing myself in person…
But I will always—always—be a writer, and you can rest assured that when I write, it comes from a part of me that I will always call home.
I know it’s been a bit since I last updated here. There’s been a lot going on, the details of which I will not bore you with, but at least I’ve given this place a facelift! (See what I did there? Eh?)
WHAT’S *NEW: *subject to have changed — be warned!
You will (hopefully) notice that everything is much more streamlined now! Navigation should be less confusing than it was while under construction (thank you to the beta testers). If you click on “books” you will be brought to a formal landing page for my current book Finding Home, as well as a few other goodies there to check out and future projects (TBA).
And the biggest and most legen—wait for it—dary addition is the ABILITY TO PURCHASE MY BOOK right here!! Isn’t that awesome?! I’m SO excited! And there are OPTIONS! OooOoOoOoOOOoo!
The first option is the Silver Edition which is a paperback copy of my book, unsigned, brand spankin’ new, mailed right to you from me. What’s the difference if you buy it here versus from Amazon? Nothing, other than Bezos doesn’t get as much of a cut this way, and I, the author, do. It’s the easiest way to help support an indie author.
The second option is the Gold Edition which is a signed paperback copy, along with a few extra little freebies as a thank you.
And the third option is the Platinum Edition, which is a signed and personalized copy, complete with freebies, and you get to choose a couple bookmarks to go with it!
BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE!
Soon I will also be offering the Finding Your Way writing prompt sidekick healing journal (. . . name pending because that was a handful to type). It’ll be a free-form mid-size notebook (cover designed by yours truly) with over 30 writing prompts that really make you think, positive affirmations, and mindset reformations for your emotional wellbeing. I’m really excited about this one, and I can’t wait to have it completed and available to you. **THIS PROJECT HAS SINCE BEEN PUT ON HOLD UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE**
I guess that’s all I’ve got for now. Thank you for sticking with me this far! Hopefully it will not be so long until next time . . .
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